So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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