Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Randomize
