a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
