This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
