Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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