OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
