it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
