it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
