I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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