Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
