In the future we'll all be gay
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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