Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
