Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
