I can't watch pbs sober anymore
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
