once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
