no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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