the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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