Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize