Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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