yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
