Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Say something about gay babies.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Randomize
