Reggie can tackle my bush.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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