You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
