It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
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