Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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