apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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