using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
