just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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