Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Randomize
