and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
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