hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize