What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
