Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize