YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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