Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
