babies were throwing up all over the place
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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