Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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