I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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