she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
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