New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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