she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
