We're facebook friends in real life
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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