Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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