drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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