So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Found the puke drawer
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Randomize
