Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I just googled if crying burns calories
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize