My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
