thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize
