Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
