Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize
