so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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